Navigating Life's Challenges with Faith (Day 80 - Orchos Tzaddikim | Will 2)
00:01 - Intro (Announcement)
You're listening to Rabbi Aryeh Wolbe, Director of TORCH, the Torah Outreach Resource Center of Houston. This is the Jewish Inspiration Podcast.
00:12 - Rabbi Aryeh Wolbe (Host)
And welcome back, my dear friends, with day number 80 on page 473 in the Ways of the Righteous Gate of Acceptance in the Treasure for Life edition of the righteous gate of acceptance in the treasure for life edition. Me'od me'od mida no'ohi lo'od. And this is a very, very spectacular trait for a person to have Shihei me'lei rotzaynu me'vatel dato me'pnei das chavero, for a person to be filled with good will and to subjugate his own will to the will of his fellow man. Imagine what a perfect husband this would be. We're describing a perfect husband. A wife could humiliate him. He doesn't answer back. He accepts her will. Right, imagine that V'dover zeh gorem shu neh avlakol. Such a person is beloved by all. Yishu oseh kirtzon, ish v by all. And why? Because he will do the will of what all people want. He's doing the will of all people. And such a person is so very close to the ways of repentance. Because when someone does something wrong and his friend comes to close to the ways of repentance, ki because kishu ochez bemasa hara uba chavere lo hochicho. When someone does something wrong and his friend comes to criticize him and rebuke him. Someone did something wrong. Let's not get into details, right, but you know, I saw you did something. It wasn't hu misratze. Miyad la'azov. Hara b'chozer l'motav.
01:42
Someone, someone who is accepting, who is accepting, will acknowledge and appreciate what his friend is telling him. Such a person who is accepting always, by the way, accepting doesn't mean that you're a pushover. Accepting doesn't mean that you have no personality. Accepting does not mean that you're a pushover. Accepting doesn't mean that you have no personality. Accepting does not mean that you just do what everybody wants, but there's a certain pleasantness, a certain selflessness that is required for a person to have this beautiful trait. But such a person is accepting. You know what you're right. You told me that I did something wrong. I accept and I appreciate it. Everybody wants to be a friend to a pleasant, nice person, and King Solomon teaches us in Proverbs and he who listens to counsel is wise, he who listens to counsel is wise. He who listens to counsel is wise. Someone who's always pushing other people away, and everyone is so. I know that what I did is right. I know that what I'm doing is correct. Right, that's someone who's not going to accept. He's putting a barrier. But what does a person need to do? Be open and willing to accept from others.
03:06
V'zeh ha'aposok enu rod salomar l'shmi'aseh ozen bovad. This doesn't mean you just hear it. Elishamei ha'pirusheshu shamei al'atsas chocham u'misratz al'asa kasha yagid lo ha'chocham. There's a difference between hearing and listening. Listening, right, what does it mean to hear? To hear is you get the message. You've got it. Listening, I'm just. I hear what you're saying. You know I'm listening, but I don't agree what I don't agree, right.
03:36
It says Yisro, the father-in-law of Moshe. He heard. What did he hear? He applied it to himself. That's the next level. That's the next level where you apply, you're not just yo. That was very inspirational, thank you so much Rabbi. And you just go on doing whatever you want, or you apply it and you make change in your life. That's the quality that we're looking for by Yishma. He says when someone tells you something of critique, you hear it. You hear that message and you apply it.
04:20
We see that what happens with such a person? That the entire Torah is included in the trait of acceptance and all of the blessings and all of the reprimands in the Torah are also included in this Keitzad. What does the Torah say? The Torah says and now, if you surely hear my voice, this is in Exodus 19, verse 5. If you surely hear my voice and heed my covenant, then you will be chosen for me from among all the nations. What does it mean? You got to hear my voice and heed my covenant. It's not enough to hear the voice. Heed my covenant, put it into action. Perush shal shamo atishmu. What does it mean when it says you shall surely hear here, you shall hear To immediately apply it. What did the Jewish people reply? We're going to do and we will hear. And indeed we were accepted by the Almighty Lini naklalos. What does it say regarding the curses, that's, the blessings.
05:49
So we know that when someone takes it upon themselves to accept, when we accept you, you hear the message, you apply it. So if someone tells you you know, I've been meaning to tell you this, carlos, I really love you, you're a really good guy, you're a terrible driver. Imagine someone said excuse me, everyone gets so defensive. No, no, no. Someone who's accepting will say you know what? Thank you. I appreciate you bringing it to my attention. Thank you for helping me become a better person, thank you.
06:29
See, what's the difference? One is a closed person locked. One person's open. They're accepting, they're accepting, they're willing to take in something else. Such a person is a pleasure to be around because they're willing to change, they're willing to admit wrong, they're not hardened, they're not stiff, they're not stuck. What's about someone? Regarding the curses that? It says they're that all the reprimands of the Torah can apply to a person who has willingness.
07:18
Again, it's referring to the hearing If you don't hear and you don't apply it. Yeah, I listened, I didn't hear it, I didn't internalize it. It says later on in the Torah the blessing that you will hear, hearing the mitzvah and the curse if you don't hear it. Anytime we see the word hearing in the Torah. It doesn't only mean using your ear, for it to go in one ear and out the other, but rather it refers to ach ratzolomash yisratzolassos, to want to do or to want to apply it. Now it may be and this is very he's using very careful language here that you should will.
08:18
The change Doesn't mean that we're going to change. Just because someone brings something to your attention doesn't mean that overnight, boom, we're going to change. Just because someone brings something to your attention doesn't mean that overnight, boom, we're going to be able to change everything. Rather, what it means is that you're going to want to. I'm going to put it on my list and when I'm up to that level of my growth, I'll implement it, but not something you just push over. Thank you very much.
08:39
Another opinion no, that we desire to accept what other people say. We see this by Jacob, our patriarch of Al-Shalom, of blessed memory. What did Yaakov? Yaakov was accepting of what his mother said. He was accepting of what his mother said. What did he merit to receive? He received the blessings from Isaac, his father. And what happened? He wanted to listen to his father and mother and took a wife, as directed by them, with the qualities that they guided, and therefore he merited to have the 12 tribes come out of him. This is from Proverbs, it says. This is from Proverbs, he says and he who listens to me will dwell securely and in tranquility from fear of evil.
09:50
So now he says there are four types of listening, four types of listening Yeh shomea v'hifsid. There are four types of listening Listening and losing. Yeh shomea v'niskar. Listening and gaining. Yeh shomea v'nisgar. Listening and gaining. Yeh shalot shomea v'hifsid not listening and losing. And lo shomea v'nisgar not listening and gaining. So he's going to explain each one of these four categories. Listening and losing is the case of Adam. Referring to Adam. What happened to Adam? What happened to Adam? What happened to Adam? He listened to the voice of his wife and what happened? He got punished. And what did he lose? For you are dust, and to the dust you will return. Okay, so that type of listening.
10:44
You have to meaning what the author here is telling us. You have to be careful, you have to be considerate of what the source is and what the agenda is. The Gaon of Vilna says while it's very, very important to be accepting of what somebody else says, of somebody else's reprimand, while that's very important, the other person doesn't know you that well, they don't know all the challenges and all the troubles that you went through in your life and perhaps they don't know how challenging this trait is for you. Therefore, he says take it into consideration what people say and apply it when you are ready to apply it. Only you know the best, you, only you know you. Everybody else may not know you as well as you know you. Okay, you understand this Very important Meaning, just because someone says something you know.
11:49
They say that there was a Yemenite Jew, got married, he's a beautiful bride and they're leaving the wedding. They're leaving the wedding. They got a gift. As they're leaving the wedding, they got a gift. As they're leaving the wedding, they got a gift. What was the donkey? The gift was a donkey. Someone gave them a donkey. That's the equivalent of someone getting a car as a gift. So they're like, wow, this is so exciting. Instead of having to walk all the way back to our home, you know from the wedding, we're going to have a limo, right, what's the limo? The donkey. They both hop on the donkey and, uh, a few people pass them and they're like you guys, not ashamed of yourself, both of you on the donkey, smashing the donkey Crazy. Like you know you're right.
12:46
The groom stays on the donkey, tells his bride you know, maybe it's time for you to you walk next to me, you know, I'm the man of the house. They pass a group of people and the people say that's the way you treat her the night of your wedding, you're just coming back. He says you know you're right. He puts her on the donkey and he walks next to the donkey. And then they pass another group of people and the group of people say first night of the wedding, she's already controlling you. This is crazy.
13:27
So they decided you know what, let's us carry the donkey. Let's us carry the donkey. We tried the other alternatives. Let's us carry the donkey. Pass's us carry the donkey. We tried the other alternatives. Let's us carry the donkey. Passed another group of people. They're like hey look, three donkeys, right, look, you can't follow what everybody says because you'll turn out a donkey, right, you got to be very careful, got to be very, very careful, and this is what our author here is telling us that there are different types. It means when you hear something, you hear that message. You've got to be careful because you know, Adam also listened and he got punished for it.
14:11
Now there's another one, that there's those who listen and get rewarded for it the proper listening. This was Abraham. Everything that Sarah tells you listen. What was his reward? He was rewarded that with Isaac shall you seed be called Meaning. He was given the great gift of Isaac. Who did not listen and gain.
14:47
This was Yosef Joseph. He did not listen to Potiphar's wife and ran away from her. She wanted to have an adulterous affair with him. He did not listen to her and ran away. He did not listen to her. His reward was that he became the leader of the land who did not listen properly and was punished.
15:24
This is the Jewish people. They did not listen to me, it says in Jeremiah, and they did not incline their ears. What was their punishment? What did they lose? Those who are for death are to death and those who are for the sword are to the sword. And it is written if you are willing and listen, then you will eat the good of the land. Im tovu ushmatem tov, ushmatem Tov ha'aretz tohelu. This is in Isaiah.
16:11
So we see that there are four different types of hearing things. There's a hearing that you get punished for. There's a hearing that you get rewarded for. There's a not listening, like Joseph, and getting rewarded, and there's a not listening and getting punished for. So we see that it's important to calculate what it is that we're listening to, the stubborn and rebellious child that we talk about in Deuteronomy. Why is he killed? He's killed because he did not listen. He did not listen and his father and his mother would take him to the elders of the city and say to the elders this our son is stubborn and rebellious, he did not listen to our voice. And what does it say further? And that all the people will stone him. Ve'al kol, yisroel Nemar and to all of the Jews. It says Mamrim yisem im Hashem. You were rebellious to Hashem and they were berated for not wanting to listen. Who? Because they're a stiff-necked people.
17:35
And after we see that everything is dependent on Ratzon, on this beautiful trait of acceptance. Therefore, every person should pay attention, notice, to follow the ways of Hashem. Therefore, our sages said Hasei ritzonu k'ritzon cho k'dei sheyase ritzonu cho k'ritzonu. Make your will the will of Hashem, and Hashem will make your will His will. Batel ritzonu cho mepnei ritzonu k'dei sheyivatel ritzonu acherem. Mepnei ritzonu cho you have to annul your will for the will of Hashem, and Hashem will annul the wicked people's, other people's will before your will.
18:26
Okay, so here we see that acceptance isn't a virtue. All the time. Acceptance needs to be calculated. We have to know when to give in and when not to, when to listen, when not to, when to follow what it is that we hear and when not to follow. This is very important for us to make that calculation. So how do we know, rabbi? How am I supposed to know if I should listen? That's why we have a beautiful Torah. The beautiful Torah guides us on the way of Hashem.
19:04
If you want to have, it's important. You know in music, it's important to always have a constant. In life, it's always important to have a constant, to have a steady. Be steady, to have something. In fact, the Mishnah tells us you should have a set time to Torah study. That means every day. Every day, even if it's two minutes, have two minutes from 9 o'clock to 9.02. From 10 o'clock to 10.05. From 11 o'clock to 11.55. It doesn't make a difference what time Pick a time of the day, but it should be kavata itim la Torah. Why? Because that becomes your anchor for the day. That becomes your anchor, that becomes your constant.
19:54
When a person studies Torah, you see that you have a constant throughout your life. When a person studies Torah, you see that you have a constant throughout your life. What is it? The hand of Hashem. Hashem is your constant. Hashem is always there through ups and downs. Through ups and downs, no matter.
20:08
You know the whole world is constantly turning right. It's always on its axis. It's always turning. Who's spinning it? Imagine someone's holding a basketball on their finger and it's just spinning. You're like someone's got to be spinning it. Someone had to give it a spin. Eventually it'll slow down, right, you got to continue spinning it. How is the world spinning. Hashem is spinning this world. Hashem is always there through the ups and downs. That's the amazing thing. It's spinning. Hashem is spinning this world. Hashem is always there through the ups and downs. That's the amazing thing. It's why everything Hashem created is round, because it's reminding us that there's always an up and a down, an up and a down. An up and a down there's always.
20:50
You're always every person. Every person has good times and has some not such good times. Every person has a moment of like, wow, such clarity and times where, like, I don't even know what to do. Confusion, disillusion is one constant. That's Hashem. That's what we say in the Shema every day to remind ourselves.
21:19
Shema Yisrael, hashem Elokein, hashem is our God, hashem Echad. Hashem is one. Hashem is a constant From the beginning of our life till the end of our life, from the beginning of creation till the end of creation. Hayah Hovev Yieh. Hashem was, he is and he will be forever and ever and ever, in all eternity. There's no beginning, no end. That's the amazing gift of the life we live. If a person is grounded with the what is the will of Hashem, then you know right away. You can smell the good, the bad and the ugly. What is the good thing for me to listen to? What is the not good thing for me to not listen to? What should I get closer to? What should I distance myself from? So, my dear friends, this concludes day number 80, and now we're going to continue with day number 81.
22:14 - Intro (Announcement)
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